Quite self-explanatory.
"Stop Crying Your Heart Out"
Hold up
Hold on
Don't be scared
You'll never change what's been and gone
May your smile (may your smile)
Shine on (shine on)
Don't be scared (don't be scared)
Your destiny may keep you warm
Cos' all of the stars
Are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them some day
Take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Get up (get up)
Come on (come on)
Why're you scared? (I'm not scared)
You'll never change
Whats been and gone
Cos all of the stars
Are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them some day
Take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Cos' all of the stars
Are fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see them some day
Take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Were all of us stars
Were fading away
Just try not to worry
You'll see us some day
Just take what you need
And be on your way
And stop crying your heart out
Stop crying your heart out
Stop crying your heart out
- Oasis
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Monday, August 11, 2008
A lifetime's worth in a week and a half...
It was a week full of anticipation, excitement, pure adrenaline rush, hopes, expectations, high energy, competition, attitude, humility, life, sadness, friendships and tragedies, sparks and passion...a little bit of everything. Ok, so may be I sound a bit over-dramatic here, but it really was a lifetime's experience packaged in a week and a half of my life.
'Success only comes to those who are too busy to look for it.' ? I say, 'Surprises and happiness only come to those who are too busy to expect them.' Right at the moment when you least expect from life, that is exactly when life brings with itself a plethora of opportunities and emotions, so strong and so deep to fathom, that you often get lost in its realms. I went into a new city, with no expectations, and came out with unexplored facets of my own personality, with new experiences, new revelations, new friendships and new heart-aches. It was a world full of opportunities, showing me new avenues in every aspect of life, be it career, people or personal development, but it also showed me where I stand and how I will really need to plan things in order to move up. Meeting new people is always fun, but the part that sucks is when they LEAVE. When everyone leaves, or starts following a path which is very different from mine. Its a pattern - you meet, you greet, you mingle, you get close, and then .... you leave. If only I could make the parting as happy as the beginning. But then again, parting is not really the end, its just a pause for some. But its a pause full of uncertainties. You don't know if you will EVER see those people again in your life, and sometimes you just need to leave it up to Fate/Destiny (words deemed not be in our control) to see if your paths cross again. Until then, you wait, and you meet more people and you get lost in their worlds, and get entangled in the same web of meet-greet-part. I guess this really is a pessimist's point of view, because an optimist would be of a contradictory opinion. I love meeting new people too, but only if their friendship would last for more than a week.
And then there are always those who leave with words unsaid and emotions unaccounted for, with whom there is no closure, and who leave you wondering 'Should I, or should I not get in touch with him/her? Would they think I am trying to be clingy, and would they just consider it a friend's call trying to keep in touch with them? Should I, or should I not?' I guess a part of my problem, is the over-analysis or over-complication of things. Why can we not simply enjoy the moment we lived in, forget about it and move on? I do an excellent job at capturing moments, but can't seem to let go and forget them. And then those moments linger in my mind for days....
There's no structure to my post, its more of a gabber than a streamlined thought. But nonetheless, it is from the complicated mesh of my thoughts and imagination.
'Success only comes to those who are too busy to look for it.' ? I say, 'Surprises and happiness only come to those who are too busy to expect them.' Right at the moment when you least expect from life, that is exactly when life brings with itself a plethora of opportunities and emotions, so strong and so deep to fathom, that you often get lost in its realms. I went into a new city, with no expectations, and came out with unexplored facets of my own personality, with new experiences, new revelations, new friendships and new heart-aches. It was a world full of opportunities, showing me new avenues in every aspect of life, be it career, people or personal development, but it also showed me where I stand and how I will really need to plan things in order to move up. Meeting new people is always fun, but the part that sucks is when they LEAVE. When everyone leaves, or starts following a path which is very different from mine. Its a pattern - you meet, you greet, you mingle, you get close, and then .... you leave. If only I could make the parting as happy as the beginning. But then again, parting is not really the end, its just a pause for some. But its a pause full of uncertainties. You don't know if you will EVER see those people again in your life, and sometimes you just need to leave it up to Fate/Destiny (words deemed not be in our control) to see if your paths cross again. Until then, you wait, and you meet more people and you get lost in their worlds, and get entangled in the same web of meet-greet-part. I guess this really is a pessimist's point of view, because an optimist would be of a contradictory opinion. I love meeting new people too, but only if their friendship would last for more than a week.
And then there are always those who leave with words unsaid and emotions unaccounted for, with whom there is no closure, and who leave you wondering 'Should I, or should I not get in touch with him/her? Would they think I am trying to be clingy, and would they just consider it a friend's call trying to keep in touch with them? Should I, or should I not?' I guess a part of my problem, is the over-analysis or over-complication of things. Why can we not simply enjoy the moment we lived in, forget about it and move on? I do an excellent job at capturing moments, but can't seem to let go and forget them. And then those moments linger in my mind for days....
There's no structure to my post, its more of a gabber than a streamlined thought. But nonetheless, it is from the complicated mesh of my thoughts and imagination.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Madness
A method to my madness...
I love this phrase...And I am realizing that I do have a method to my own madness. And its a pattern that I've been following for almost a decade now, since the realization of 'who I really am' dawned upon me. It starts from establishing a set of rules for myself. Rules that involve anything that is forbidden, religiously, culturally, socially, consciously. Rules of the heart and Rules of the mind. Most of the times, I stick by my rules. But then one fine day my madness begins, captured in the moment and taken over by the rebellious and wild-free-spirit in me, I decide to break my own rules without thinking of the consequences. All is fine until now. Except, when the rule is broken, the moment is past, and its time to move on, I actually cannot let go of it. I can't just capture the moment in a picture frame of my life and move on. I want to hang on to it for as long and as deep as I can, until the ruthless and ever-so-healing tides of time snatch it away from me, or until I fall so hard on the ground that it is hard to get back on my feet. I alienate everything around me and shut myself in my own fortress of solitude reliving those moments that I had captured. And then one day, having spent enough time behind the barriers, I decide to get out of my shell, feeling all strong and triumphant. But I am not the same anymore. I am bruised, and so I am a cynic, and I still have a wall around me. I carry on, establishing another set of rules and boundaries for me, only to see myself break those rules and follow the old method of madness yet again...yet I thrive...and so I survive.
I love this phrase...And I am realizing that I do have a method to my own madness. And its a pattern that I've been following for almost a decade now, since the realization of 'who I really am' dawned upon me. It starts from establishing a set of rules for myself. Rules that involve anything that is forbidden, religiously, culturally, socially, consciously. Rules of the heart and Rules of the mind. Most of the times, I stick by my rules. But then one fine day my madness begins, captured in the moment and taken over by the rebellious and wild-free-spirit in me, I decide to break my own rules without thinking of the consequences. All is fine until now. Except, when the rule is broken, the moment is past, and its time to move on, I actually cannot let go of it. I can't just capture the moment in a picture frame of my life and move on. I want to hang on to it for as long and as deep as I can, until the ruthless and ever-so-healing tides of time snatch it away from me, or until I fall so hard on the ground that it is hard to get back on my feet. I alienate everything around me and shut myself in my own fortress of solitude reliving those moments that I had captured. And then one day, having spent enough time behind the barriers, I decide to get out of my shell, feeling all strong and triumphant. But I am not the same anymore. I am bruised, and so I am a cynic, and I still have a wall around me. I carry on, establishing another set of rules and boundaries for me, only to see myself break those rules and follow the old method of madness yet again...yet I thrive...and so I survive.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Mad World
I wish I could write such simple yet effective and true lyrics. Unfortunately these are not my words, but they sure reflect my thoughts and feelings on how 'mad' everything is turning in today's world.
"Mad World" by Gary Jules
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very, very mad world mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me
And I find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very, very mad world ... mad world
Enlarging your world
Mad world
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Le Petit Prince
"On ne voit bien qu'avec le coeur, l'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux."
(One can't see well except with your heart, the essential is invisible to the eyes.)
- fox to Le Petit Prince
(One can't see well except with your heart, the essential is invisible to the eyes.)
- fox to Le Petit Prince
Monday, July 7, 2008
Hope
Hope. It's a funny thing. It's a pity for one who doesn't have it. And painful for one who does (I am sure a lot many people will beg to defer with this perspective of mine). It is not exclusive. It brings with itself a foray of other feelings/emotions, one of which is Expectation. Is it really possible to separate the two? Is it possible to hope, yet not to expect? Because expectations hurt. Expectations put unnecessary pressures on people who don't really deserve that pressure.
Someone I don't even know well enough, but have a harmless crush on...I start hoping that they will reciprocate, and I start expecting things/favors/moments from them. And when things obviously don't turn out the way I expected, there is disappointment and anger. Anger at the person who is innocent and completely unaware (and carefree to some degree) about my feelings/circumstances. The reality of it all is, I am really angry with myself, not the other person. I am angry for expecting and hoping foolishly. But it is hard to accept it, so we blame...we blame the other person. And then we carry on...we know its not fair to expect from that person, yet we continue down the never-ending road of hopes and expectations leading to disappointment. Hoping, against all hopes, that this road that we are on, no matter how painful or prickly, will lead to happiness, satisfaction and reciprocation one day.
An overload of the words 'hope' and 'expectations', I agree. But you get the point right!
Someone I don't even know well enough, but have a harmless crush on...I start hoping that they will reciprocate, and I start expecting things/favors/moments from them. And when things obviously don't turn out the way I expected, there is disappointment and anger. Anger at the person who is innocent and completely unaware (and carefree to some degree) about my feelings/circumstances. The reality of it all is, I am really angry with myself, not the other person. I am angry for expecting and hoping foolishly. But it is hard to accept it, so we blame...we blame the other person. And then we carry on...we know its not fair to expect from that person, yet we continue down the never-ending road of hopes and expectations leading to disappointment. Hoping, against all hopes, that this road that we are on, no matter how painful or prickly, will lead to happiness, satisfaction and reciprocation one day.
An overload of the words 'hope' and 'expectations', I agree. But you get the point right!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
What are you really scared of?
So an entire month has passed. Actually, almost 2 months have gone by, and I haven't written anything. Hit a dry spell I'd say. Quite dry and this is hardly a comeback. In fact, I am quite sure the very few people who were reading my posts, would have given up on this not-so-regularly-updated-blog a while ago. But then again, I can't resist my urge of electronically penning down my thoughts in this little blurb. I've been thinking, what are we really scared of?
And I am not talking about cockroaches, or thunder bolts and lightning, or even global warming, because let's face it, most of us spend our time whining about the weather whereas very few of us actually worry about global warming and try to do something about it. Anyways, that's completely beside the point for now. I am not asking you what scares you temporarily. I am talking about the constant fear that lurks in your mind and that you rarely accept. May be a lot of us are actually still living in denial about our worst fear. To me, it seems like 'Rejection' is what scares me the most. The realm of rejection spans from our parents, to the society in general, to even God - an entity that we've never seen, yet we are scared of. As a kid I was scared of not doing the right thing and not living up to my parents' expectations. The process of growing up gave me knowledge, but that knowledge also gave me some fears. As I grew up, I developed my own style, my personality and a set of idealistic beliefs. Initially, there was no fear. My beliefs were new, the place was familiar, and I was home. There could be no rejection anymore. They all knew me, they had accepted me. But then it happened. A new country, strange faces, strange habits and very unfamiliar territory. It was a big leap. With that leap, came some inner strength accompanied with some unpredicted fears. Now there was the fear of being rejected by this new society. Here, importance was given to matters that seemed most trivial to me until now - what clothes one is wearing, what's your style statement, who do you hang out with etc. As I grew up here, it seemed like what defined you more was your outer appearance. In this world, at this stage of my life, people are really judged by the cover. So there was the fear of being rejected because of my cover. And then there was always the occasional 'fear of being rejected by someone you like' lurking in the corner. And being scared of rejection from the loved ones is understandable, after all they are your loved ones. But being scared of no acceptance from people who perhaps don't even care to know you, who might pass a sly comment or two about you, have a good laugh about it and forget that you ever existed, being scared of rejection by such morons? Why? This is like an ever expanding bubble of pointless fears. But a bubble, which when bursts, will truly free me. This fear of 'rejection' keeps me stuck in a loop. It keeps me confused, pulls me down and keeps me from accepting and appreciating who I truly am, or would like to be.
I can only imagine how powerful it would be to get rid of all such fears, to truly see yourself for who you really are, put yourself out there, and tell the world 'Bring it On, I don't give a damn, I am fearless and I am ready'.
And I am not talking about cockroaches, or thunder bolts and lightning, or even global warming, because let's face it, most of us spend our time whining about the weather whereas very few of us actually worry about global warming and try to do something about it. Anyways, that's completely beside the point for now. I am not asking you what scares you temporarily. I am talking about the constant fear that lurks in your mind and that you rarely accept. May be a lot of us are actually still living in denial about our worst fear. To me, it seems like 'Rejection' is what scares me the most. The realm of rejection spans from our parents, to the society in general, to even God - an entity that we've never seen, yet we are scared of. As a kid I was scared of not doing the right thing and not living up to my parents' expectations. The process of growing up gave me knowledge, but that knowledge also gave me some fears. As I grew up, I developed my own style, my personality and a set of idealistic beliefs. Initially, there was no fear. My beliefs were new, the place was familiar, and I was home. There could be no rejection anymore. They all knew me, they had accepted me. But then it happened. A new country, strange faces, strange habits and very unfamiliar territory. It was a big leap. With that leap, came some inner strength accompanied with some unpredicted fears. Now there was the fear of being rejected by this new society. Here, importance was given to matters that seemed most trivial to me until now - what clothes one is wearing, what's your style statement, who do you hang out with etc. As I grew up here, it seemed like what defined you more was your outer appearance. In this world, at this stage of my life, people are really judged by the cover. So there was the fear of being rejected because of my cover. And then there was always the occasional 'fear of being rejected by someone you like' lurking in the corner. And being scared of rejection from the loved ones is understandable, after all they are your loved ones. But being scared of no acceptance from people who perhaps don't even care to know you, who might pass a sly comment or two about you, have a good laugh about it and forget that you ever existed, being scared of rejection by such morons? Why? This is like an ever expanding bubble of pointless fears. But a bubble, which when bursts, will truly free me. This fear of 'rejection' keeps me stuck in a loop. It keeps me confused, pulls me down and keeps me from accepting and appreciating who I truly am, or would like to be.
I can only imagine how powerful it would be to get rid of all such fears, to truly see yourself for who you really are, put yourself out there, and tell the world 'Bring it On, I don't give a damn, I am fearless and I am ready'.
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