Thursday, March 27, 2008

You know its bad for you...you still can't resist

Exactly what the title says. Its just the unstoppable urge of doing something that you have wanted for a long time but you know is so wrong for you, something that says explicitly 'I am WRONG' but you still want it. Its like a pack of cigarettes, a pack that mentions 'Warning: Smoking is injurious to health' and yet it doesn't stop such a large population of the world from smoking. Their justification, oh this doesn't always result in lung cancer, or we're going to die one day so what difference does it make. I am in no position to judge them, nor is anyone else. I believe everyone around me has done something in their life, which they knew was bad for them, and yet they went ahead and did it, because it felt good. The thing is, do we really need to know when to draw a line. While fulfilling a desire, when do we know that we're not playing safe anymore and have reached a point of no return. Is this why we should abstain from temptations in the first place? But then why do people say that its better to fall and get up, because that is the only way you can learn. What an oxymoron this life is, you need to learn in order to live, in order to learn you need to fall and learn from your own experiences and mistakes, but at the same time you should resist all temptations and not get to a point where you will fall. How do you fall if you resist taking a risk? And how do you learn if you don't fall? I guess I am just going in circles here. It is probably another chicken-and-egg problem. Prevention is better than cure, but then if you have never been diseased, how will you ever find a cure?

On another note, can we even differentiate between what we really want and what we need. We can mistake our 'want' for what we 'need' and when we realize it, it can be too late. There is so much in life that we want and so little that we need, but if only we could see the difference and apply it, life would probably be simpler and uncomplicated. But then as humans, no matter how much we tell ourselves that we need our lives to be simpler, we probably have an exceptional talent for complicating our lives, at least I do.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Horoscopes and Tarots

Is there any accuracy in these general daily/weekly horoscopes and tarot card readings? Or is it all just a hoax and another gimmick to blindfold us with unnecessary faith. Just another belief added to the endless list of faiths and beliefs we seem to be accommodating these days. For instance, read this, my tarot card reading for today:

"When you are ready to be serious, other people want to play, but now that you are ready for some action, someone you like may be more contemplative. Your flexibility is the key to happiness today; if you can make the necessary adjustments, you'll learn something crucial. Trust your changing moods as you decide when to hold on and when to let go. Your intuition is strong and will lead you in the right direction."

As a matter of fact, these lines could not be more accurate about what's happened in the last few days for me. And this is kind of eerie and creepy at the same time. Does this mean all the other people in the world, born on the same day as me, have similar events happening? Its kind of hard to believe in the accuracy of something so general. The funny thing about all this is, sometimes when I can't take decisions myself (which unfortunately is a lot of times), these kind of frivolous, general yet sometimes true words from horoscopes or tarot cards help me in my decision. Like for now, I need to hang in there and be patient and believe in my intuition because apparently its strong and will lead me in the right direction!

A good place to read weekly horoscopes is www.freewillastrology.com/horoscopes. It is not so much about the truth of the horoscope, but about the writer's style of a horoscope. Rob Brezsny is the writer, and what a writer he is. Its hard to believe how aesthetic, and appealing his horoscopes sound, again, not because of any accuracy but because of the examples, the quotes he mentions and the way he inspires you about life and your days in general. There's passion and there's beauty in his horoscopes. As you can see, I am quite a fan of his and although I don't believe 100 percent in the accuracy, I do believe in the efficacy of his writing.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Why can't happiness last longer?

Few moments of happiness and then a long lull, full of the uncertainties and wait for the next 'happy moment'. 3 hours of happiness, followed by a day of day-dreaming and fabrication of unreal dreams, and followed by another day of 'reality striking you back in your face'. And then you're back to square one, back to where you had started it all, wondering why you ever entered that happy moment in the first place. I think this is just a personality trait. There are people who enjoy whatever moments they have and then 'move on'. I fall at the other end of the spectrum, I enjoy a moment to the utmost, and then wonder 'why can't I have more of this' and spend the next few days not enjoying what I had, but brooding over what could have been, or why it could not last longer. Instead of savoring the taste, I waste my time worrying about wanting and achieving more of it. If only I can learn to cherish things in the present and look forward to the future, instead of brooding over the 'could haves and why nots' of the past, I'd be happier.

After all, as Abraham Lincoln aptly said, 'Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.'

I guess I just need to Make-up-my-mind!

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Unsexiest women alive..really?

As if we don't have enough insecurities in our lives, one now has to go through the pangs of being publicly "crowned" as being one of the top unsexiest women alive. This is in regards with the recent most survey conducted by "Maxim" magazine for the unsexiest women alive (of course where else but Hollywood). I guess its one of the ugliest prices you need to pay for being a celebrity. The ones who are rated the Sexiest need to keep up with that image, starve themselves or get plastic surgery or do God-knows-what to maintain their looks, and the ones who are graciously getting older are made to look like victims of aging and a concoction of using bad makeup or hair products or whatever it is that makes the other 'sexier' women look so sexy and goddess-like in magazines. I don't think being sexy comes from the way you look. Being sexy is an attitude you carry, it is in the way you behave and the work you do. But then these days the definition of sexy is so distorted. The best part is, we, as a society find pleasure in a celebrity's (or even our Facebook friends') shattering hopes and faltering lifestyle. We love the gossip, whether its in the tabloids, or on Facebook, in spite of knowing that this is all about a real person, who I agree might be living the most notorious life or looking hideous, but whose life is none of our bl**dy business. Anyways, there is no appropriate way of ending this post, except for saying that this is just a 'rant' and hopefully it can become more than a rant one day and we can come to realize how frivolous our lives are getting.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Push or Pull?

As dodgy as this title sounds, I HAD to write this post. While exercising at the gym a couple of days ago, I was using a machine basically for working out the inner and outer thigh muscles, which required pulling in weights for one set and pushing weights out for the other. The push used the outer muscles, whereas the pull used the inner thigh muscles. Unaware of the fact that we have way more muscles in our outer thigh, than the inner, I most conveniently put heavy weights for both push and pull only to realize that the pull was way harder than the push. Actually, to be frank, I had to reduce the weights during the pull to almost 50% of what I used in pushing. Turns out, because of lesser inner thigh muscles, the pull was painful, harder and highly inconvenient compared to the push. Needless I say, that I derived a similarity to our lives from this situation. I just thought, in real life it is easier to push away people. There's little effort you need to drive someone away from you (I mean, it of course, depends on the person who's being pushed away, some people are not as easy to push away). But in order to pull people towards you, it is more time-consuming, exhaustive, takes a lot of energy and effort, but at the end its all worth it. May be to some of you reading this, these two things don't make a connection, but to moi they do.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Really?

The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return...

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

People aren't real

"People aren't real," said one of my friends to me a few days ago. People aren't real because they cannot stand up for themselves, are hypocrites and are easily corrupted by the society. This is what he had to say.
But I wonder who gets to decide what 'REAL' stands for? The definition of course varies from person to person. The dictionary describes 'real' as something that is an actual thing and has an objective existence. True enough. To my friend, 'real' seems pure and untouched. To him 'real' seems perfect.
To me, 'real' is flawed. Real has imperfections and that is what makes it actual. Perfection is unreal, perfection is Utopia. It doesn't exist, but we strive for its existence because trying to achieve the unachievable is what keeps us going. Would I want someone who is not corrupted by the society? Sure, it would be great to find someone like that. Moreover, it would be nice to un-corrupt myself from the society. Its not just about eating meat, or about the addiction to coca-cola and other marketing gimmicks, or about using the not-so eco-friendly means of transportations, or about doing a million other things that are deemed 'wrong' in someone else's dictionary. The society makes distinctions between what's right and wrong. Its about doing the 'right' thing for myself. For some of the people out there, doing the right thing may involve doing things keeping others in mind, and for others doing the right thing just involves one person - 'I'. Its a conflict within myself as to which one of the two am I, and which one of the two should I be. Most of the times I fall in the first category, when I think too much about how something that I do might affect someone else, or even sometimes how it might affect my own reputation. I know, its pathetic to think that way, to let your decisions be guided by what others might think of you or make of your decision, but oh well, I never said I am flawless. I am quite flawed and very real (in my definition of Real). But then there are times when I really wish I could only live for myself, take decisions because I think they are right for me not because that's what the world would do if it was in my shoes. Taking decisions with my family in consideration has rarely been a botheration to me, but what does frustrate me sometimes is taking decisions in life based on perceptions of other people who are quite unimportant, to say the least.
I really wish that someday I can apply Ayn Rand's philosophy of Objectivism to my life, and do things because they are right, and because they are right for 'me', not because they please someone else and are right according to them.

"My philosophy, in essence, is the concept of man as a heroic being, with his own happiness as the moral purpose of his life, with productive achievement as his noblest activity, and reason as his only absolute."
-Ayn Rand (on Objectivism)

Monday, March 3, 2008

Quarterlife crisis

I am not really done a quarter of my life, I mean there are still 2 more years to go, but I am nearing it. I guess the confusions, the uncertainties, the frustrations and second thoughts, the C-R-I-S-I-S I am having right now, I'd like to put them in this self-explanatory yet exaggerated term - Quarterlife crisis. The issues faced right now are probably faced at other times in life, but I just felt like using an overly dramatic word so here I am. My situation right now is that of a free and confused wild spirit. There is so much I want to do, and so much I want to explore, but there is so much that I bind myself with. There are innumerable things that I judge myself for, and sometimes, actually most of the time feel like people are judging me all over. I have probably reached my own zenith of self-consciousness. There are times when my friends need my attention, but I act completely oblivious to my surroundings and to their need. I might spend time thinking and amusing myself with trivial things, like my crushes, or how beautiful the snow is outside, or when is the winter all going to be over, or what's going on in what TV show, or what I should wear to the following party, or why am I becoming so vain, or what's going on with journalism these days, or how there are bigger issues in this world to work and write on rather than Britney Spears or the U.S. Election; I spend my time THINKING about all of this, when I have more important things to take care of - like study, or file for my immigration and a million other things. In simple terms I am procrastinating, and I am day-dreaming. For anyone who has watched the movie 'Amelie', I am Amelie Poulain, except for the do-gooder part right now. It feels lonely sometimes, and some other times I think to myself 'what the hell am I doing here, and there is so much more that I can do, but I am not even trying...', and then at other times 'I just don't care'! I am still getting to know myself and it doesn't seem to be getting any easier. This is probably one of my most confusing posts, but I thought its better to get it out here than let the thoughts wander in my head.

Food for thought:

"Words that don't DO anything, have no meaning."
- Alex

Saturday, March 1, 2008

As time goes by...

You must remember this
A kiss is just a kiss, a sigh is just a sigh.
The fundamental things apply
As time goes by.

And when two lovers woo
They still say, "I love you."
On that you can rely
No matter what the future brings
As time goes by.

Moonlight and love songs
Never out of date.
Hearts full of passion
Jealousy and hate.
Woman needs man
And man must have his mate
That no one can deny.

It's still the same old story
A fight for love and glory
A case of do or die.
The world will always welcome lovers
As time goes by.

Oh yes, the world will always welcome lovers
As time goes by.

- Casablanca